NB: For those who know, the banner will be changed soon, lmao.
Trigger Warning: racism
This piece has been in the works for weeks now. Honestly, I’ve been pushing back the publishing date because I didn’t know what angle I wanted to take. At some point, I realized that I didn’t want to write a pacifying piece or try to explain the racism in the sport and then spend time arguing about why people should care. I am not in my kumbaya era, and I will not pretend otherwise. Some people talk about those issues with much more patience and grace than I do. So instead, I’m choosing to talk about myself.
I stopped watching hockey in 2016 after P.K. Subban left Montreal. At the time, there was a lot of talk about how Marc Bergevin *allegedly* traded Subban for being a “locker room cancer.” Something that seems kind of ironic in hindsight given that he was willing to take on Tony DeAngelo on the Habs when the New York Rangers bought out his contract in 2021. Although many things have changed in the sport, racism remains a constant and coming back to witness all of it is simply depressing.
We’re barely starting March, and it’s already been a banner year for stupid shit in hockey. There have been more racist incidents in the sport than I could count on one hand. Let me give you a quick rundown:
On January 11th, Rick Westhead reported that two former National Hockey League off-ice officials filed a lawsuit for unjustified firing for reporting a colleague who used racist and sexually charged language for years while working for the league.
During an American Hockey League game on January 12th, Krystof Hrabik from San Jose Barracuda mimicked the movements of a monkey in a taunt that targeted Boko Imama of the Tucson Roadrunners.
On January 22nd, the videotape of an incident in the ECHL in which Jordan Subban was subjected to racist taunting from a Jacksonville defenceman named Jacob Panetta got released on social media. Panetta made monkey gestures in the direction of Subban in a confrontation.
As a punishment, the American Hockey League suspended Hrabik for 30 games, and the East Coast Hockey League suspended Panetta indefinitely.
On January 25th, a formal complaint was made to Hockey Saskatchewan because U15 Tisdale Ramblers players heckled racist slurs towards Indigenous players on the River Hawks during a game.
We also learned recently after a lengthy investigation that the 5 players who hurled racial slurs at Halifax goalie Mark Connors in a tournament during the fall have been suspended 25 games each.
Klim Georgiev, a hockey player in the Manitoba Junior Hockey League (MJHL), got suspended for 18 games for taunting an opposing team with racist gestures. He is also required to participate in anti-racism and cultural sensitivity training.
OK, so let’s take a step back, and let me show my mama that these humanities degrees are worth it.
In 1903, W.E.B Dubois introduced the concept of double consciousness in The Souls of Black Folk (1903). He defined it as “a source of inward “twoness” putatively experienced by African-Americans because of their racialized oppression and disvaluation in a white-dominated society.” Later, Black feminists would expand on the concept to introduce the idea of the triple consciousness in order to account for the role gender plays in life. Black women have to see themselves through the lens of blackness, whiteness, and also through the patriarchy.
As I’ve been getting more immersed in the socio-political aspect of hockey, I’ve been thinking more about this concept. The idea of being a Black woman and a hockey fan comes with a constant state of questioning yourself and your identity.
At this point in my life, I like to believe that I've come to terms with who I am. I love what I love, hate what I hate, and will always find time to complain.
However, I don’t always have this clarity when it comes to hockey. I enjoy the sport, but I recognize and accept that I can’t do anything about it. I also want to condemn racism, but at the same time, I don’t have the energy if it only leads to meaningless change.
It feels like groundhog day every time a new story comes out. People are outraged on social media, someone releases some asinine apology, and then we learn about a suspension… just to restart the process all over again, the following week.
I’m not saying that people shouldn’t be outraged because rage and anger are both valid emotions. I’m just at a point where I’ve run through my capacity for rage, and racism in hockey doesn’t deserve it anymore. The reality is that other circumstances - political or personal - affect me more, and I have to be able to direct my energy towards that.
Here’s the truth about hockey: I can always leave. I would like to think I have enough hobbies in my life that I don’t need to stick around if I don’t want to. No one is stopping or even paying me (I wish) to actively follow this league. I do it because I was able to find my community and I’ve made a few fond memories.
It’s a paradox to exist as a fan of this sport while being a Black woman. I’m here for the entertainment value of it but I also don’t see the players who risk their bodies and well-being every day as commodities. I want better for the league and players who always seem to get the short end of the stick. Nonetheless, I’m very aware that the energy is never reciprocated. These men barely stand up for their Black teammates. They often don't want to fight for better conditions for themselves, so hoping that they’re going to care about my reality and my experiences is almost ridiculous.
I know that everyone is learning at their speed, and I respect that. For many people, the summer of 2020 was their wake-up call.
However, my very existence means that I’ve never had the luxury of being ignorant about these issues. So what are they doing for people like me who don’t want to wait until everyone else catches up in five to ten years?
Even after the “Great NHL Reckoning” - whatever that means - the league still doesn’t understand that acting apolitical or not taking risks isn’t serving them well. There hasn’t been a single initiative that has gotten us past the initial conversation of “racism is bad.”
Conversations, where people rehash the same talking points with no actual changes that benefit anyone, are simply not the way to do things.
Organizations tend to have this annoying habit that when they find the one “diverse” person that everyone is raving about - good or bad - they are sticking to them. Ask yourself, who gets to have their voices heard in this sport? And I don’t mean simply between us, folks on Twitter, but out there, in the media. It’s easier (& lazier) to call the same person to champion the diversity in your organization than to actively search to hire and pay people who can make a difference in the sport.
And to be fair, I don’t blame them. The league keeps getting away with this (and they can) because when the listening & learning part is over, they can simply release an ugly jersey for Black History Month, and people eat it up every time.
I’m genuinely not surprised by all of this. I just think it’s time to admit that change will never happen until we actually show people the door when they do racist things.
The reality is, I’m also not holding my breath for what’s next for this sport. I feel like I and other Black fans have done our part by even showing up.
The league and the sport have to want to meet us halfway at some point.
Other (but semi-related) Thoughts
The Maple Leafs solved racism by having a three-course conversation!
For the past few weeks, my friend Sara has been working hard on her Leafs’ propaganda, and to be honest, she didn’t have to do much heavy lifting because the team itself has been working overtime to stay relevant on my timeline (and in my mind).
Speaking of futile attempts at a more “inclusive” league, the Leafs’ EDI said, “fellas, let’s share Jamaican beef patties to decolonize hockey.”
Here is my reminder that just because you’re a racialized person, it doesn’t mean you should be the face of EDI in an organization.
To be fair, their initiative might have worked - I guess - because I did watch the entire thing. However, I decided to enjoy it from a comedic perspective because the substance of the conversation was mid at best.
I am so sorry - I don’t want to sound rude - but I just don’t think anything significant can come out of the mouth of somebody who mainly eats at an institution who seasons all their meals with the same cajun spices, and I was proven right.
To quote Mr. Campbell, “It’s like chicken pot pie but better - WAY better.” LIKE SIR, you can’t be serious?!? Even though you can still hear me cackling about it, patties deserved more respect.
I would like to add that he was able to get another chuckle from me when he casually mentioned that he had Black friends back in his little town of Port Huron.
A few other highlights were how Spezza non-ironically implied that Italians were BIPOC, and Auston Matthews eating jerk chicken as a pre-game meal. He also reiterated how his one wish in hockey is that players get more freedom in the dress code.
My problem with his wish is that not a lot of them are willing to actually try it or are even curious enough to think outside of the box.
Proof: when they discussed fashun in these Sportsnet tidbits
If you’re curious about other parts of this segment: Part 1, Part 2 and Part 3.
In the end, they would all end up in some type of Drew merch or an ugly golf polo. For the love of God and my eyes, we’re already dealing with too much in the world.
The outdoor game between Nashville vs Tampa Bay
Did anyone know that the NHL held an outdoor game before the puck drop last weekend? I mean, (insert sarcasm voice) I don’t understand if you didn’t; the league promoted it so well.
More seriously, how did that game, suppose to be one of the biggest events of the season, get outshined by a game between the Leafs and Gaby’s new favorite team, the Red Wings?!?
Even *I* was glued to my screen for the third period to know the final score of a game that could have been easily confused with a pee-wee one if it wasn’t airing on Hockey Night in Canada?!
Anyway, congrats on them for putting on an entertaining 17 goal show, which is just a reminder that hockey is basically a soap opera.
How Can I Make This About Me?
I need y’all to stop putting hockey in stuff where it doesn’t belong. Every time there’s a big story happening in another league (currently - the Major League Baseball being in a lockout), people in hockey gotta be “DADDY! DADDY! Watch me twirl.'' It’s honestly so embarrassing.
So welcome to a new segment “How Can I Make This About Me? (Hockey Edition)”
How can you say baseball is losing its relevance with a straight face, and not think that hockey isn’t? If the gods’ weren’t in the NHL’s favor, some blue checks wouldn’t be tweeting nonsense because they would probably be covering the said sport “losing” its relevance. These people love to rewrite history because if not, they would need to admit that their dear sport is probably only 50 years (Editor’s note: I have a strong argument for 25 years but no one listens to moi - Gaby) away from claiming bankruptcy. Come on now, the Coyotes are literally going to be playing in a college stadium. The secondhand embarrassment is too much.
Shit I’m Obsessed with this Week
As much as I am hip and in touch with pop culture. Sometimes, it gets too overwhelming to catch all of it. I add suggestions to my mental watch/to listen to later list, just to revisit them years later when I feel like it. This week, I’m in “my blast from the past” era concerning my media consumption, and that’s what you’re getting.
Criminal Minds
I watched some episodes here and there, but never got into it until recently, after a good review from my friend Océane.
I know she has a lot of shooters, but Mrs. Jennifer Jareau is the most annoying character I’ve ever seen. Her character development was excellent in season one, but she quickly regressed afterwards. I can’t believe we had to say goodbye to Elle, but J.J. stuck around. CRIMINAL *pun intended*
Mitski
I can confirm that I am now a Mitski fan.
Again, shout-out to my good friend Sara, the playlist queen, who made me a personalized playlist for my introduction to Mitski.
Anne with an E
I technically binged-watched that show last year, but I felt like rewatching it these past few days. I’m amazed by the quality and the greatness of the show. It is simply too excellent. To be honest, if I was part of the fandom back then, you would’ve caught me begging Netflix & CBC for a season 4 too. #RenewAnneWithAnE
Side-note for ppl building a case against Gaby: her lifelong dream is to visit Prince Edward Island to meet her own Gilbert Blythe. Real bold for someone who hates Nova Scotia and some of its people as much as her! (Jonathan Crombie as Gilbert Blythe was the best thing Canada has ever given me and I will NOT be shamed - Gaby)
I told y’all we were haters with a lot of thoughts.
Love over hate,
Perrye
I love this !!!
This might be because I'm a leafs fan, a Black leafs fan for what it's worth. But I did appreciate a shallow attempt at highlighting one specific aspect of one specific black culture's food. Gotta start somewhere, and the work the organization has been doing through the coaching development program seems to be a step in the right direction when it comes to opening more opportunities. Maybe they should have showcase that side of the work they're doing more and talk about the systemic issues in hockey itself.
I agree that as much as I love Spezza, this comparison to white italians and 400+ years of continued oppression to Black people needs to go. At the same time, I recognize he's trying to make a connection in a way that makes sense to him. The reality is he has not had that lived experience. I hope someone will have that conversation with him. Lot's of blindspots on display in that video, so I hope that is addressed amongst the team in any equity work they do.
Congratulations, you're the first writer to prompt me to leave a comment on their post. Good work.