Alright, before we get started, let’s clarify that there will be no hateration, holleration in this dancery.
Every other month someone - usually a straight man - re-discovers that many hockey players’ partners are white and blonde. Cue the jokes, haha; here we go again. It often reverts to a ton of misogyny and “pick-me” commentary, which sucks.
Comedians often talk about how behind every joke, there’s some truth or social commentary to be made - whether it’s good or not. Given the recurrence of these jokes, we can say the same for them. There’s a reason hockey players date very similar-looking women; their choices don’t come out of the blue. Like we’ve said before, hockey is a reflection of broader society, and this is just another way it manifests.
This isn’t us saying that the WAGs are immune to criticism. We’re well aware of the social-political climate of hockey (ask us about our DMs!) and that some of these people would happily tell us to go back to our countries if given a chance. Between the “alternative” vaccine schedules, MLMs, and questionable posting, there are many other things we could criticize them for. However, we would never resort to their looks if we were inclined to drag somebody. We can be much more creative than that, believe us.
We wanted to write about this because the jokes only hit the first time. We didn’t mean to be #serious, yet here we are, lol.
Western Beauty Standards
The legacy of colonization plays a role in shaping today’s racial and power hierarchies. From the moment Europeans began their global quest to subjugate the entirety of the world, nobody escaped their desire to be at the top of the power hierarchy. This meant the establishment of white supremacy, whose effects are still discernible in every aspect of our society. One of the consequences is that many of our current western beauty standards are meant to celebrate whiteness and its proximity to power.
Today’s standards have been mainly driven by the cultural omnipresence of the United States. Since the 20th century, western media has primarily dictated what is considered “beautiful” globally. With the rise of social media and families like the Kardashians, some beauty ideals have changed. But at the core of it all, it is meant to establish the superiority of whiteness. It’s so deeply embedded in our society that even though we don’t explicitly hear “white is better,” it still affects how we perceive beauty. Even in our own cultures, we hear this in many different forms that we don’t actively think about, such as praising “good hair” or how light-skinned someone is.
As the microcosm it is, hockey does not escape from these standards either. It makes sense that they gravitate towards whiteness because most of society does.
Men use women as social currency & they meet that standard.
French sociologist Pierre Bourdieu coined the concept of social capital. He defined it as “the sum of the resources, actual or virtual, that accrue to an individual or a group by virtue of possessing a durable network of more or less institutionalized relationships of mutual acquaintance and recognition” (Bourdieu, in Bourdieu & Wacquant, 1992: 119).
Hypermasculinity is a predominant overarching reality in sports. It affects their relationships, whether they are homosocial (i.e. they spend a lot of time trying to impress each other) or in how they interact with other women - romantically or not. In order to achieve those hypermasculine ideals, women are often used as a form of social currency to establish their standing in the social order. We’re not saying these men don’t have real and meaningful relationships with their partners, but it definitely plays a role in the type of people they are willing to approach.
Women who represent the most ideals of beauty standards also leverage more power in society. White feminism tells us that white women tend to come right after white men in the power hierarchy. Although they are building something meaningful in these partnerships, they benefit from the image they present as a couple. In many cases, this is the idea of the perfect nuclear family.
Blonde as a class marker
Given that only 2% of the world is naturally blonde, those jokes about how every WAG eventually becomes blonde are not particularly untrue.
Maintaining blonde hair is not just an endeavor to approximate western beauty standards; it’s also a subtle way of indicating wealth. Anyone who has dyed their hair can tell you that being blonde is not cheap. There’s a lot that goes into it. Aside from the lengthy process to convert to blonde in a way that won’t mess up your hair, most stylists recommend 4-6 weeks between touch-ups as the roots come in. There may also be additional treatments, and maintaining the color at home requires products that are generally more expensive. Being blonde indicates they have the time and money to keep up appearances.
We’re not particularly partial to frying our hair, but hey, to each their own.
Hockey is an insular sport that prioritizes whiteness.
When criticizing hockey players and their dating choices, we tend to forget that they live in a micro-society where they mainly encounter and interact with other white people unless you’re yunggnate29 (and even he made questionable choices - shoutout to that famous Instagram post). It’s not just a thing in hockey; a survey done by the PPRI showed that 75% of white people have entirely white social networks. The issue is compounded in hockey because of its very insular culture and the uniqueness of their journeys. As players go through the development process, many end up on junior hockey teams in small towns that are predominantly white. It is also a cost-prohibitive sport which further narrows the community of people that can participate. They generally engage with fewer people of color as they progress through the system. The sport is also notorious for its conformity and the extreme pressure to adhere to it. Players tend to talk, dress the same and even partake in the same off-season hobbies. It is not far reached to say this also lends to a tendency to date within their social circles, which, as established before, means white.
So taking all of these things into account, do we really expect any different? It’s not some grand social phenomenon or something particularly unique to the NHL. There’s a reason jokes about the NBA becoming the National Biracial Association have come up. It just happens to be more apparent in hockey because of its overall whiteness. White on white crime, bae-bee.
The next time someone thinks they’ve made some grand discovery, feel free to send them to us. We’ll tell them to get new material.
With love,
Perrye and Gaby
P.S. - Don’t forget to apply to the PHWA x THWL mentorship!
P.P.S. - We’ll be back in September! We have college send-offs, weddings, and thesis deadlines!