Other Thoughts: Playoffs Edition
Let the chaos begin!
Can you believe it’s already the Playoffs? We feel like it was just yesterday that we started this newsletter, and now we’re here. Time flies when you’re having fun/sowing chaos/insert any variation of cliché quotes.
We’re not really stats girls, but we always gotta have an opinion. Here are our Very Serious Other Thoughts about the NHL playoffs… or sorry, the Stanley Cup Playoffs.
Side-note: How are you gatekeeping the name, my guy?
Instead of just dumping our brackets here, we came up with some questions that we thought were important to discuss (and we give you our first-round predictions as well). Enjoy!
THWL The Playoffs Question Game
Who do you really want to see win?
Gaby: I’m not telling you this. I’m too superstitious to be answering this question. I don’t even watch a series if I miss the first game because of superstition lmao.
Perrye: I wish I could say the same, but my pick put a curse on themselves by signing Joe Thornton last summer and winning the Presidents’ trophy. They are the creators of their own downfall.
Which team do you not want to see win?
Gaby: Leafs or Oilers because it would be funny (and she’s against any Canadians’ team winning the Cup, so if Justin Trudeau wants to prevent her crossing the borders, I’m all ears. #hater - Perrye)
Perrye: Any team who was part of the Stanley Cup Finals in the bubble - Stars & Lightning
Who Has The Worst Vibes?
This is how you know we’re haters because we immediately named like half of the teams. All for very valid reasons, of course.
Boston Bruins: We still haven’t forgiven the Breeding Material Comment from Taylor Hall.
Colorado Avalanche: Too much repressed energy; we love Cale Makar tho.
Dallas Stars: Every time Rick Bowness gives a quote, we literally wonder how this man still has a job. The team has been doing well, but certainly not thanks to him.
Edmonton Oilers (just Gaby though): Can’t convince me they aren’t evil.
Pittsburgh Penguins: Amongst my many gripes is the fact that a city that needs that many bridges makes no sense. - Gaby
Washington Capitals: Do you know a team that celebrates as much as they do their Stanley Cup every year, even though they won it 4 years ago? Boston is cursed, but even they got over winning a goddamn Stanley cup. The only reason we’re reminded of their win it’s because Canucks fans are still crying about that loss.
Any team that has won the Cup in the past 10 years: So no three-peat, no other ring for Sidney Crosby, no Kings or Blues. Perrye just hates the vibes for St. Louis and Gaby is from Illinois, so.
Which series will have an upset?
Gaby: I think the Lighting-Leafs matchup will be an upset regardless of which way it goes. Truly doing it for the culture.
Perrye: In an ideal world where Juuse Saros wasn’t out for 4 to 6 weeks, I would have said that the Predators would have created an upset by beating the Avalanche. Now, I gotta say that Capitals (urgh!) might surprise the Panthers. Bobrovsky, stand up and stay in your damn crease, for god’s sake!!
Which player who’s under pressure to win it all?
Nathan Mackinnon and his chickpeas.
Also, it’s not a player per se, but the Flames GM, Brad Treveling’s job is on the line if they lose the first round, which I don’t entirely hate since he needed to be fired 4 seasons ago. - Perrye
Who Do You Think Will Win the Conn Smythe?
We know that this is a “usually” important question, but we don’t care to be honest. We actually think this trophy means nothing because you gotta wait until you see the winning team to award it. Also, Conn Smythe was racist.
Which series seems boring, and you definitely won’t tune in?
Gaby: My midwestern tendencies are saying the Wild vs Blues. I could not tell you who is on that Blues team even if you held a gun to my head, tbh.
Perrye: Oilers vs Kings - I don’t think the series will be boring, but I don’t care about anybody on these teams except Quinton Byfield. Plus, the games will start past my *ideal but currently imaginary* bedtime on the East Coast, so I definitely won’t tune in.
Team Chaos Choice:
Gaby: Lightning to see them 3-peat. Because it’s not a traditional market, and I love that they absolutely gamed a system they tried to fix in 2015 and were shot down by the other teams.
Perrye: The chaotic one in our duo is Gaby, so it makes sense I don’t have an answer to this question.
First Round Winners
There is literally no thought behind this other than how the spirit moved us. However, we think there will be many game 7s in this round.
Florida Panthers vs Washington Capitals
Perrye’s pick - PANTHERS IN 6
Gaby’s pick - Yeah, what she said.
Tampa Bay Lightning vs Toronto Maple Leafs
Perrye’s pick: Leafs in 7
Gaby’s pick: Lightning in 7
Boston Bruins vs Carolina Hurricanes
Perrye’s pick: Hurricanes in 6 because I don’t need Bruins injuring anyone else past the first round. They have the energy of that little kid who runs past his mom screaming, “A KNIFE.”
Gaby’s pick: Ugh, the Hurricanes lost all their goodwill with me this year, so I gotta go with the Bruins. Bruins in 5.
Pittsburgh Penguins vs New York Rangers
Perrye’s pick: Rangers in 5 because we’re rooting for K’andre Miller in this house.
Gaby’s pick: Rangers in 7 because Sidney Crosby likes to extend my suffering.
St-Louis Blues vs Minnesota Wild
Perrye’s pick: Against my will, I’m gonna say Blues in 6.
Gaby’s pick: Wild in 6 because Marc-Andre Fleury still deserves good things based on how unsettled the end of his career is looking.
Los Angeles Kings vs Edmonton Oilers
Perrye’s pick: Oilers in 7 - they never take the easy route to victory.
Gaby’s pick: Oilers in 5. Unforch, but I think the Kings are too young of a team right now.
Colorado Avalanche vs Nashville Predators
THWL’s pick: Rough times with Nashville and their goalie situation. Avs in 5.
Dallas Stars vs Calgary Flames
Gaby’s pick: Shoutout to all my country bitches. Flames in 7.
Perrye’s pick: POINT BARRE!
Non-Playoffs Other Thoughts:
Yesterday, Gaby shared the story of a young woman and her experience with a Blackhawks advisor. We’re still hoping to hear from the team on how they will address the issue. We’ll talk about it more in-depth at a later time.
The Vancouver Canucks Year-End Press Conference
We’re not going to touch on the propriety of asking someone a personal question in the middle of a media scrum. We will say, though, that it shouldn’t take a player publicly breaking down for everyone to treat him with empathy.
We hope he gets to spend meaningful moments this summer with his dad and that he seeks additional support for himself.
To End On A Good Note: Phil Kessel vibing through life. After going through what he has been through, you can tell him nothing, and as a fellow cancer survivor, Perrye respects the energy.
In case you missed our last issue and need a serotonin boost:
There will be no Thursday issue because Gaby has finals, and Perrye will be on her staycation. We will see y’all next week. Happy Playoffs! :)
With Love,
Gaby and Perrye