Other Thoughts: Congratulations are in order for everyone except the CHL
Listen, we know it’s Tuesday but we’re releasing this now on purpose! We’re still messing around and figuring out what works best for us, so we’re gonna try this for a couple of weeks.
We’re just happy we made it through May. It’s also Gemini season which means Gaby is probably being more of a menace than usual. Here are this week’s thoughts:
The CHL Needs To Go
TW: Sexual Assault
Last Thursday, Rick Westhead reported that Hockey Canada had resolved a lawsuit with a $3.55 million settlement involving them and the Canadian Hockey League (CHL). The case in question alleged a 2018 sexual assault committed by eight hockey players, including Hockey Canada’s World Junior Team members. While the players were not named, the lawsuit referred to these players as members of the CHL and Canada’s U20 Men’s Junior Team. Given the prominence of the said roster, which includes current NHL players, the league released a statement saying that they would launch their investigation to get the underlying facts of the assault.
Furthermore, the lawsuit alleged the assault included the perpetrators bringing golf clubs into the room to intimidate her, forcing her to shower, recording a video saying that she was sober, and pressuring her not to report them or cooperate with them in any investigation.
Honestly, if we shared what we really thought regarding the players involved, we’d probably get banned from the platform. However, we will say that we cannot be the only ones tired of hearing every possible iteration of “this is terrible and reprehensible” only to see it happen repeatedly. We have to start talking about the CHL and the other hockey governing bodies as what they are: horrible organizations led by apathetic people who raise bad and traumatized men. The actions of these men following the assault indicate that they knew what they were doing was wrong and still chose to go ahead with it. We don’t have any expectations that these leagues will change independently. Still, it seems unfathomable that they continue getting federally funded and sponsorships from corporations like Nike, who claim to care about corporate social responsibility. We honestly don’t know what the solution would be other than completely dismantling the leagues at this point. We just hope that the victim gets the support she needs and the time to heal.
Perrye recommends this french article! I think it’s one of the best I've read on the topic: https://ici.radio-canada.ca/sports/1886632/chronique-martin-leclerc-hockey-canada-allegations-agressions-sexuelles-junior?fbclid=IwAR1sbKoLUGga5LrJ5_RGhI6hE9vNbA3hQQwBReI3o-Y1ExXmrYiHHZN35TY
Finland won the 2022 Men’s World Hockey Championship Gold
Congratulations to the Finns, but more specifically to Valtteri Filppula! He joined the triple gold club on home ice when Finland defeated Canada in overtime to claim the gold medal. The victory came three months after he captained the Finns to the gold medal at the Beijing Olympics.
#StarsAreJustLikeUs: The Prime Minister of Finland celebrated and enjoyed the victory with a glass of wine at hand! We get her. Watching hockey is stressful, and sometimes all you need is a little liquor in the system to get through it, especially in OT.
Retirement celebrations for Jason Spezza
Let’s give Spezza a well-deserved round of applause! He announced his retirement as a professional hockey player over the weekend. We would also love to get a job and be well-paid as a special assistant to the GM right after ending our playing career. If we didn’t appreciate Spezza as much, we would probably talk more about how the pipeline between player to executive with no experience is ruining the sports and the main reason things are the way they are, but that’s a topic for another day.
I - Perrye - would like to add it’s incredible how hard the Leafs’ propaganda is working because the way some of you tweeted, you would think he was with the Leafs for the past 18 years. Also, was I the only one who forgot about his years in Dallas between his stints on Ontario’s teams?
Note from Gaby: It is very funny that the Leafs just keep getting different versions of father figures. Good job on making this one permanent!
Tony Deangelo Allegedly Selling His Gear
We honestly think that Deangelo could add content creator next to his job title with the way his antics have been making the rounds in our Other Thoughts issues for the past few weeks. Good for him!
Anyway, we don’t know what’s funnier. Tony asking 3K for sweaty and used Rangers shirts and equipment or the fact that he’s so mad having these items in his house that he had to become a Depop seller during the playoffs?
Not only are you still broke but also getting clowned (as you deserved) on Beyoncé’s Internet. What happened to discretion and shame? We’re losing the plot here.
NHL Conference Finals Predictions
Our second-round predictions were not as accurate as the first ones, and for that, we apologize. It was mostly based on vibes, and evil does prosper sometimes, alas!
Listen, who would have thought that Panthers would get swept, and Markstrom would have been the more mediocre goalie during the Battle of Alberta!
We didn’t have the Battles we deserved, but we will always have the memories we made along the way.
Colorado Avalanche vs Edmonton Oilers
Perrye’s pick: Avs in 7. I’m more interested in seeing how the league will market their superstars and, overall, this series in what is arguably by some “one of the best western conference finals mashups' ' in the past few years. It has already started with their graphics, but let’s see how they will deliver in the next two weeks. I also honestly hope that MacKinnon finally gets his Stanley Cup because I need this man to stop seeing himself as a victim for not being at the same ring numbers as his bestie. It’s sad but not tragic, my guy.
Gaby’s pick: Avs in 7 because my distaste for the Oilers supersedes my distaste for Nova Scotian boys. I feel further vindicated seeing Nazem Kadri advance to the Western Conference before Kyle Dubas’ Leafs. Immense Satisfaction.
Tampa Bay Lightning vs New York Rangers
Perrye’s pick: Although I’ll be rooting for the Rangers, the Lightning will move on to the Stanley Cup finals. Will it be a sweep or a 7 game lollapalooza event? I don’t know, but they will win and that’s all y’all need to know. Since I truly need to give a number, Lightning in 6, but don’t hold me accountable for this.
Gaby’s pick: Yeah, no, Lightning in 5. The Rangers are cute and all but the Lighting lowkey dog-walked the Panthers, so I’m not expecting much if we’re being honest. I’d say it could be a sweep, but sweeps make me sad, so I’d like to see them win at least one. My bad y’all!
Lol @ the Hurricanes.
With Love,
Gaby & Perrye